How uncertain you are. So uncertain, yet so full of possibilities. I look at you with mixture of both fear and exhilliration.
Fear, because I do not know what you hold. I know good things are in store. But what if those good things are not what I am expecting? What if I am building my hopes sky high only to be met by – by what again is unknown. But perfect love casts out all fear, they say. So I open up my heart for Love. I open up my heart to that Thing that will banish all these cares away.
Like jumping into a roller coaster, I look at you with exhilliration. I may be afraid at first, but you are definitely something to look forward to. There will be many twists and turns, many up and downs, but I will just scream my heart out and enjoy the ride. The ride will be exciting. I am sure if it. It is a brand new adventure I am willing to take on.
I shall jump into you like one jumping off the edge of a cliff. Prepare to catch me because here I come.
Ahh, Malaysia, truly Asia. It will be six years soon. How are we doing?
I don’t know what to make of what is happening right now. Politically. Coz everything’s got GST. Nah, that’s all behind us now. We’re moving forward, aren’t we?
At any rate, thanks for taking me in. Living here is fun. You have lovely infrastructures, awesome natural vegetation, interesting historical sights — I look forward to every road trip I plan with my friends. This June we want to go to Sekinchan and Kellie’s Castle. I’m so stoked!
Food here is uhhh-mazing. I have you to blame to the kgs I gained during my first few years here. No matter. With a few tweaks to my diet and exercise, my body’s back to being a healthy range. But nasi lemak… I’m looking at you. You’re one of the culprits. Char Kuey Teow and Everything Goreng, I’m looking at you, too.
I’m going to miss you when I’m gone. I know you’ll miss me, but I think you should know now that I shall miss you greatly, too. But why am I saying goodbye? It’s far too early for a long farewell now, isn’t it?
Well. One thing I know. I’ll make sure I make the most of every moment I spend with you.
Dear Mama and Papa,
Yey! In a few more days, I’ll be seeing you again! In less than a week, your little girl is coming home again.
I’m looking forward to eating like there’s no tomorrow and then trying to burn it all off jogging the following day. What nice resto have you discovered this time? Is Ma still dancing-slash-exercising to the tune of “The Fox”? I saw a book adaptation of it at the book fair the other day. They illustrated the different lines — “Dog goes woof”, “Cat goes meow”. Too bad I didn’t buy it. I only had budget for four books. That was already the fifth. Oh well. Next time, then.
I hope my room is already okay. I hope there are no more r-a-t-s scurrying about.
Well, regardless of the state of my room, I’m excited to see you all again! Thank you for making good use of my roaming number. Your sms messages never fail to put a smile on my face. Now we will see each other beyond text!
Just a few days more!
Oh there you guys are again. Did you miss me? I didn’t realize it, but I sure did miss you.
I missed this. Writing feverishly as I transcribe the dialogue in my head onto paper. Not being able to keep still because I’ve got a million and one story ideas running through my mind. Wishing I had a 25th hour to use so that I could sit down and write them all out.
I’m back in the groove again. I hope this groove does not wear out. Give me that gift of consistency, give me the perseverance to smash all writer’s blocks that may come my way, grant me a spirit that will enable me to finish all these and finish them well.
Because at the end of the day, I’d love to do more of these and I’d love to be able to do it well.
Stay with me, my dreams. Stay with me and inspire me all the more.
Are you there God? It’s me, Anjeli.
2015 is here. The first month is already about to end. Soon it will be February and then it will be March. Then April. Then May. Then December once again.
The days are long, but the years are short, they say. In a way, I want this year to be over. 2016 can’t come quickly enough. But in another way, I don’t want 2015 to end.
This year began with an explosion of emotions. It wasn’t quite the bang I was expecting, Lord. But I know, through it all, You are good.
You’ve brought this wayward heart back home again. You’ve brought it back to its first love.
You. It will always be You, Lord.
I’m grateful for life. I am grateful for love. I am grateful for another year you have given me to live out, to enjoy. I’m grateful for yet another opportunity to pour out and love all the more. So, as this year pushes on, let me not forget all that You have taught me this past month. Let me walk with You closely. Let me love You deeply. Grant me a greater revelation of Your love. So that I may love others as You love me, too.
Thank You, Lord. I love You.
If you could un-invent something, what would it be? Discuss why, potential repercussions, or a possible alternative.
Thanks for the great idea, rarasaur!
The letters stare at me, cold and emotionless against the glare of my computer screen. “Hello, how are you?” they read. Hello? How are you? Those four cordial words would never be enough to convey all the emotion I’m feeling right now.
Longing. Wistful pining. Heartfelt concern. Love. These deserve more than an email. These deserve more than bytes of pixels sent over secure protocols and SMTP connections. These deserve —
These deserve me seeing you face to face, seeing your reaction as I shakily speak those simple words out. These deserve me hearing how you’d respond, instantly or after a moment or two of thoughtful silence — not after days of Internet muteness.
The next best thing is a real letter, complete with my awkward strokes and tense lettering.
But what can I do? In the end, I realize it’s better not to undo.
I type a few more paragraphs. Hopefully they’ll do me and my heart justice.