Julieta, Julieta, wherefore art thou, Julieta? Check thy watch and refuse to be late — arggg.
Where is she?
Where oh where has my little sis gone? Oh where oh where could she be?
She said she’d meet me here for her lunch break. Things must be pretty busy at the health centre for her to be this late.
Gosh, I wish she’d hurry up. I’ve got crazy weird news to tell her, you see.
Come on, Julie. Show up already. Or else I’m going to burst like a can of pop that has been all shook up.
Tap, tap, tap, tap. Ugh. This isn’t doing me any good.
Fine, I’ll let it out already.
Here goes —
To the president. Of the Philippines.
It’s so unbelievable, right? I’m not even sure how it happened. All I know is that a strange person dropped by my house this morning, introducing herself as the president’s PA. She showed me a marriage contract — one that has apparently materialized out of nowhere, since I have no recollection of having gotten married to anyone — proving that I was the president’s — gasp — first lady.
I told her she had the wrong person, but there it was in black and white. The contract had my full name — Aleksandra Elisabeth Salarson de Guzman — down to all the eccentric spelling nuances. It had my undecipherable signature as well.
So what did it all mean? What did it all imply? I asked the PA those questions and all she said was that I had to be in Malacañang that evening.
That’s seven hours away. Oh, I hope Julieta would get here soon. She’s always been the sane and level-headed one. She’d tell me what to do.
Suppose this was all real? Suppose I had perhaps gotten a bit tipsy and had maybe flung myself into a Vegas-like ceremony with the most powerful man in the Pearl of the Orient? Suppose I’m not dreaming up this wacky, far-fetched nightmare?
Well, I suppose I should get my act together, then. Would it take a lot of work to become a president’s wife? He’ll need me for support. He’ll need me to give him nuggets of wisdom, too, from time to time, I guess. He’ll need me to flutter like a social butterfly during classy engagements, to be the people’s lady during community events, to be a witty speaker during press conferences. He’ll need me to stand forever by his side.
Gosh, I don’t know if I’m up for it.
Julieta, please get here fast.
I need all the words of wisdom and encouragement that I can get.