October is approaching. So are the deadlines, the third long exams and the Finals.
Okay. Stop. Breathe.
By next week I’ll be bombarded with the numerous group meetings, cramming nights and…
Hold on. Breathe again.
This week is my week of rest. I have no exams. (Academically speaking that is. In terms of LIFE exams, God has different things in mind.) Yet, once the next week starts, I won’t be able to stop those exams from coming (ang going… and making way for the next). Sleepless nights, here I come.
It’s not that I’m not used to this. I have already spent three separate nights for three different subjects (CMSC 150, SOSC1, CMSC124), literally working/studying straight without any sleep. I guess I’ll just have to add a couple more to that list.
Lists. Hahaha. I have to learn about lists in java. That’s a laugh. I’m in the third year and I still don’t know how lists work, or even how to declare lists in java.
Java. Mocha java anyone? I’m trying not to become too stressed out this week. I’ve had enough of that for the previous weeks. I mean, what with all the exams, the requirements, the emotianal turmoil, and the “beatings” from the Lord that I had to go through… And now this. Not this. Not this again. Lord, I can’t handle it. Not now. Not now. Can You take my emotions away for a while? I’m tired of being hurt. I’m tired of being unappreciated. I’m tired of being the one who has to apologize. Pero sige lang.
Waaa… And to think that this week is not yet “heavy” compared to those weeks to come.
I’m holding on to a promise though. That this season, things are going to be different. It’s a NEW season. Winter has passed and spring has come. (The weather agrees with me though the calendar doesn’t). That’s why, right now, I’m letting go of everything. I’m free falling. I’m letting go and falling… into the arms of the Father…
Misty Edwards says it well in her song, “Just in time”:
Like a rushing river am I
Like a raging torrent inside
I find that I’m full of knowing nothing
I find that I’m hungry for the fullness of Christ.
Like a rushing river am I
Like a raging torrent inside
I’m LETTING GO of the mountain view
I’m letting go but WHAT INTO???
I’ve been crucified with Christ, I’ve been crucified with Christ
I’ve been crucified with Christ, Yet not I
The one thing I know
You make all things beautiful
You make all things beautiful
You make all things beautiful
JUST IN TIME
See? Everything will turn out beautifully. Just in time. Just in time.
Sigh. Halfway through my breathing period. Only a few more days to go,
one… two… three… BREATHE.
scribbles and stories 
Lovely Day (out of eden)
When troubles come my way
I look to you and
everything’s ok.
When help seems to disappear
I
look to You and then its all so clear.
When hard
nights turn into hard days
How i long to seek your face.
When blue skies turn to gray
I look to You and then I
know its gonna be a
it’s gonna be a lovely day.
When I wake up in the morning, Lord
and the sun
light hurts my eyes
and something without warning, Lord
bears heavy on my mind.
Then I look to You (then I
look to You)
and the world’s alright with me (and the
world is alright).
Just one look to You
and I know its
gonna be (its gonna be).
I think its gonna a lovely day
Smile! (inencourage ko raw ang sarili ko, noh…)